Rule 62

You’ve probably been to a 12-step meeting where someone mentioned Rule 62. If not, you will.
The rule is unofficial, its origins are sketchy, the author is unknown, but the meaning is clear: Rule 62 simply states, “Don’t take yourself too seriously!”

Maybe you’ve attended a meeting where some poor soul was pouring his heart out about how the cops pulled him over and found a bindle of cocaine behind the front seat. “The thing is, it wasn’t mine,” the distraught speaker laments. “My girlfriend left it there.”

Suddenly, the room erupts into laughter.

Now, if this admission had been made at a counseling session, or to a group of “normies,” there would have been compassion instead of mirth, “Man, that’s a bad break,” instead of “Keep coming back!”

But those of us who have already walked down that road see the humor in his story. That’s because many of us have been there before, sweating bullets as we stand spread-eagle behind our car watching a cop tear up the interior.

We also recognize the futility of pointing fingers and denying blame.

It’s Rule 62.

When those in recovery begin to laugh and point out our self-pity and egotistical deceptions, we become hurt and angry. But eventually it becomes clear that we must lighten up and focus on recovery. One of the first tasks in most 12-step programs is to acquire humility. Part of that means you have to be able to laugh at yourself. And, of course, don’t take yourself too seriously.

Again, the origins of this rule in AA — an organization with no rules — are somewhat obscure.
Some say Rule 62 is the result of AA’s Tradition Four, which reads, “Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole.”

Back in the 1940s, AA had grown to the point where there were groups throughout the United States. Each group had its own set of rules affecting the local organization. Some of these groups had regulations that would appear bizarre today. For example, one group said hard liquor was prohibited, but beer was OK — in moderation. Other groups prohibited women from joining, according to one oft-quoted Alcoholics Anonymous archivist.

When the New York office tried to get a handle on all this, there was even more controversy as groups, and individuals battled each other for their point of view. Out of this, and other issues, came the 12 Traditions.
The Rule 62 story probably came about as a result of all of these rules and regulations. If AA had put all the rules into effect, no alcoholic would qualify for membership in Alcoholics Anonymous.

More to the point, if there were no levity in meetings, few would join. And while visitors might be stunned at the gallows humor, residing underneath is a deadly earnestness and a realization that our first concern is alcoholism. For us, to drink is to die.

But Rule 62 has a definite positive purpose: Anytime you’re upset, a look at that unwritten rule can often set you straight. And you might even laugh at yourself.