How a Bad Attitude Hampers Recovery

"The only true disability in life is a bad attitude" – Scott Hamilton, American figure skater and Olympic Gold Medalist, won four consecutive U.S. Championships (1982-1984), overcame testicular cancer, brain surgery for a benign tumor and then removal of an aneurysm which left him with a two-thirds vision loss in one eye (born 1958)

Let’s face it. Everyone has a bad day now and then. And it doesn’t matter if we’re in early recovery or have been clean and sober for many years. We can still get bogged down inside our head, worrying over this or that or trying hard to overcome a particularly thorny issue or problem.

Naturally, we will find ourselves facing challenges in recovery. Everyone does. But it’s when we allow our negative thoughts to take over and continue unabated and unchallenged that we can find ourselves getting into trouble in our recovery. It’s at such a juncture when we need to take stock of our situation and begin an immediate course correction. By that we mean taking some time to think about what we have to feel grateful for, instead of what’s bad or missing from our lives right now.

If we fail to do an about-face and correct our bad attitude, we’ll be chipping away at our foundation of recovery. And that’s never a good thing, but it isn’t impossible to turn around.

Just how does having a bad attitude hamper recovery? Let’s start at the beginning. If we constantly churn out negative thoughts, we’re sabotaging our efforts to do what we need to for ourselves in recovery. We’re likely to be unmotivated to take action and that results in no change. When we don’t change, we don’t make any progress toward our goals. Indeed, we find it tougher and tougher to even think of goals, let alone craft any plans toward achieving them. So, right from the outset, if we allow ourselves to think bad things, not much good is going to come out of it.

Another way that a bad attitude hampers recovery is that we’re not very pleasant to be around. That can make encouraging and supporting us extremely difficult, whether it’s our sponsor or 12-step group members or our loved ones and family members. Not that they won’t continue to try to assist us, but it will be more of a challenge for them. And, while we’re still engaging in our bad attitude and putting others off, once again, we’re not taking any steps toward healing.

Maybe we have such a low opinion of ourselves that we cannot see past the harm we’ve done to others and ourselves. Our mind is so filled up with thoughts of all the bad things we’ve said and done in the past that we just can’t seem to move beyond our current negative state. We’re, in essence, in a state of paralysis, also not good for our recovery.

Stuck in the past, thinking bad thoughts, projecting a bad attitude so that others distance themselves from us – is this what we want for ourselves in recovery? The honest answer should be no, of course not. But not all of us are used to being honest with ourselves, or anyone else, for that matter. It takes practice to work on opening up, and it’s hard to open up when we feel so locked up and closed in by what’s bothering us.

Recognizing that our bad attitude is hurting our recovery efforts is the first step in changing our outlook. We do need to allow ourselves the permission to change, in order for us to then move forward and take the steps to change. Surely we have some kind of dream, or have had a dream about what we want for ourselves in this life. Now that we’re clean and sober, we’ve left our addictive past behind us and have a fresh start. That should count for a lot and can be a strong motivator in helping us move out of our negative thoughts and toward a healthier outlook.

Ask for help from our sponsor, fellow group members, and our loved ones and family. Whether we believe it or not, they’re all here to assist us. If we are among those who lack a family, make our 12-step group and other support groups our family. It’s not that they do the work for us, but their encouragement and solidarity of purpose in our overall recovery will help us immensely as we strive to make our way in recovery.