Rarely Have We Seen a Person Fail Who Has Throughly Followed Our Path
The most critical part of this declaration of sorts from “How It Works” are the last four words: thoroughly followed our path. I want to focus on this idea, not to say that people don’t get sober and stay sober other ways, but that the early experiences with AA showed that if you DID follow the path they laid out it was rare to fail.
Everyone has heard stories of “failed treatment” or laments that “this program just doesn’t work.” I would say rarely has that person actually followed the path laid out for them, either by their treatment program, therapist, sponsor, or whomever is involved in guiding them toward long-term abstinence.
It can be little things. Maybe you get a lot of cravings, and you’ve been told you need to pick up the phone the instant you get a craving and tell someone about it – don’t keep it a secret. Yet you don’t. You struggle alone. Eventually that struggle, alone, gets pretty hard. Frankly, most recovering alcoholics would say, “Good luck with that.”
Think about half-measures. Let’s even put aside any addiction at the moment. When in life have you really wanted something and put your all into it – no stone unturned, no task left unfinished? Now ask how many times have you really wanted something but only put so much effort in. It should be easier, so that extra bit of work seems a bit onerous. I mean, really, why should I have to do all that to get what I want? Isn’t my desire enough?
Unfortunately, in most things in life, desire is only the motivator toward success. It certainly isn’t the sole ingredient. Think about athletes. You might love playing baseball and dream of playing in the Majors, but that love and desire for the outcome are only motivations. You have to practice everyday, even when you’re tired, or sore, or missing out on something your friends are doing. Olympic athletes have a lot more than desire working for them: they dedicate themselves to a singular path. They give up a lot of things to stay on that path toward the ultimate event. They have a coach or many coaches, mentors, and peers who help guide them along, keeping them on track toward that dream of making it to the Olympics. Sometimes they might not like what a coach tells them. Sometimes they might not want to go to another practice. In those cases, the desire for the goal is what pushes them to do the real work. Of course, there are people who get injured or decide it’s not the life for them, and they give up the idea of the Olympics. But those who do make it thoroughly followed a path that has been forged by other athletes, coaches, and trainers.
There are consequences for half-measures. You cut your chances of success dramatically. Some might limp along for a while but most will fall by the wayside if they don’t give themselves completely over to that ultimate goal.
